[ He doesn’t respond. But he shows up not too much later, dressed in his usual clothes. He’s got some fucked up bruises and maybe—maybe—he’s moving a little slower, a little more carefully than before. But he’s upright and mobile, and that’s the only part that really matters. ]
[ It annoys him that he doesn't get an answer, waiting just outside the brothel where Jaskier lives because Carver is always more important than what he'd been doing, and the moment he sees him, his eyes narrow, slipping out of the shadows of the building to meet him before he even crosses the street. ]
I want to know what happened.
[ He's frowning at him, ignoring anyone around them as he looks him over. ]
[ Yeah. That's a look, isn't it? Carver sighs, already regretting how much he said, but the alternative was blustering forward and trying to pretend nothing happened when Larus will probably suss it out just fine on his own. Not so long ago his skull was cracked open. Rosita dragged him out, sat with him when they both thought he was dying.
Now, he's fine. So it goes. ]
The fog. Got caught in it.
[ He exhales. It wasn't just with Felix. Hadn't been that bad for a long time, moments stacked upon moments. It aches now, in the afteramth. ]
[ Maybe he would find out, but that truth only gets him so far, stepping in close to gently hover his fingers over the bruises without touching them as he tries to assess the damage. There's more that he's not telling him, and though Larus knows the middle of the street isn't the place to be having this conversation, he doesn't care. It's no one else's business anyway. ]
It happened to me too. [ As if it'll make Carver feel better knowing he wasn't alone. ] But I want names. Details.
[ He can't promise that he won't do anything, but it's better to know. ]
[ Something in the air, making people going full brutal on each other. All sound and fury, and blood in the teeth. He tried to strangle Rosita. He hurt Grayson in ways that ache in the remembering, and that you don't take back or forgive, only survive.
Silently, Carver steps closer and knocks their heads together. They're out in the open. Anyone could see. He doesn't care. ]
Got stabbed a few times. Cracked my skull open. Thought I was gonna die, but I didn't. What're you gonna do if I tell you, huh?
[ His time in the fog is blurry at best, compartmentalizing it and storing it away to never think about again. It hadn't been anyone important to him or anyone worth the time to contact afterwards, so why should it matter? It doesn't. All that matters right now is Carver, watching him and accepting the way he presses into his personal space to push against him.
The feel of it is like immediate relief, conscious of how much he needs this.
He always needs this. ]
Why would I do anything? [ He might, though. He isn't quite sure yet. ] I just want to know. I can take better care of you if you tell me.
[ It matters because they hurt you. But he doesn't voice that thought, knowing he'll find them regardless because this is something he can't ignore. He's already working on how to find this person when Carver pulls him back to the moment with the way their heads gently knock together. ]
I'm here. [ Because what else can he say? ] Have you slept? Eaten?
[ His hand comes up to rest against the side of Carver's neck like a simple touch will tell him all he needs to know. ]
[ Yeah. He's here, and Carver's still alive, and that's enough for now. That's a start. Things settle. Carver closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. Holds it for four even as he presses into the touch. He's hurting, still, but he isn't dead.
[ It's never enough with them, but Larus finds that it's easier to care about someone else rather than himself. ]
I'm fine. [ Which is a vague reply at best. ] We should get off the street. I'm not in the mood to kill anyone right now.
[ Because he would, and if he's honest, he has for less. But things like this, with Carver, are completely different, and he leans into him for a moment, soaking up the contact and allowing himself to drown in the sound of his breathing and his heartbeat. He's alive. He wished that was all that mattered. ]
You'd give me shit for saying that, [ Carver points out softly. But they'll just go in angry circles attacking that point, so he doesn't. He just reaches out to squeeze Larus's arm, and then exhales again. ]
Still, he thinks he's more capable of defending both of them if it came down to it, staring at Carver's face for a moment before he also sighs and moves with him. ]
[ As they move, he takes in their surroundings and sticks close to Carver. He still wants to know who had hurt him and maybe why, but they don't usually talk about those things. They don't really talk about much these days. It's a blind spot, and logically, he knows that.
But he hasn't been thinking clearly for a while. ]
How long do we have?
[ He wonders if Carver has anywhere else to be after this. ]
[ His expression thins for a moment, trying to take in everything he says and everything he doesn't. And maybe it's impulsive, stopping Carver with a gentle pull of his hand before pushing into his personal space and curling an arm around him. ]
It never feels long enough.
[ His words are soft, leaning in to kiss him and uncaring that someone might see them. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Larus?
no subject
I want to know what happened.
[ He's frowning at him, ignoring anyone around them as he looks him over. ]
no subject
Now, he's fine. So it goes. ]
The fog. Got caught in it.
[ He exhales. It wasn't just with Felix. Hadn't been that bad for a long time, moments stacked upon moments. It aches now, in the afteramth. ]
Got my bell rung.
no subject
It happened to me too. [ As if it'll make Carver feel better knowing he wasn't alone. ] But I want names. Details.
[ He can't promise that he won't do anything, but it's better to know. ]
no subject
[ Something in the air, making people going full brutal on each other. All sound and fury, and blood in the teeth. He tried to strangle Rosita. He hurt Grayson in ways that ache in the remembering, and that you don't take back or forgive, only survive.
Silently, Carver steps closer and knocks their heads together. They're out in the open. Anyone could see. He doesn't care. ]
Got stabbed a few times. Cracked my skull open. Thought I was gonna die, but I didn't. What're you gonna do if I tell you, huh?
no subject
The feel of it is like immediate relief, conscious of how much he needs this.
He always needs this. ]
Why would I do anything? [ He might, though. He isn't quite sure yet. ] I just want to know. I can take better care of you if you tell me.
no subject
Just some bitch ass jarhead. It doesn't matter, Larus, it really doesn't.
[ He bumps his head against Larus's. ]
Just wanted to see you.
no subject
I'm here. [ Because what else can he say? ] Have you slept? Eaten?
[ His hand comes up to rest against the side of Carver's neck like a simple touch will tell him all he needs to know. ]
no subject
That's good enough. ]
Some.
[ Not much. So it goes. ]
Have you?
no subject
I'm fine. [ Which is a vague reply at best. ] We should get off the street. I'm not in the mood to kill anyone right now.
[ Because he would, and if he's honest, he has for less. But things like this, with Carver, are completely different, and he leans into him for a moment, soaking up the contact and allowing himself to drown in the sound of his breathing and his heartbeat. He's alive. He wished that was all that mattered. ]
no subject
C'mon. Let's go somewhere.
no subject
Still, he thinks he's more capable of defending both of them if it came down to it, staring at Carver's face for a moment before he also sighs and moves with him. ]
Is there anywhere you want to go?
no subject
[ It's safe for a few hours, at least. ]
It's not far. We could go there. Or - wherever you want.
no subject
Show me where.
[ He'll follow him but stay close, clearly interested in watching him and being within arm's reach. ]
no subject
[ He inclines his head slightly. ]
This way.
no subject
But he hasn't been thinking clearly for a while. ]
How long do we have?
[ He wonders if Carver has anywhere else to be after this. ]
no subject
[ It’s a melancholy thing to realize, now. He meets Larus’s eyes. ]
So, as long as you want.
no subject
It never feels long enough.
[ His words are soft, leaning in to kiss him and uncaring that someone might see them. ]